Category Archives: witch

The Debate of being a solitary or a coven member Witch

Merry Meet All,

I am a practicing solitary Witch as you all know. However, I do from time to time, participate in some local rituals and events. The most recent was the Ostara Ritual held at the Universalist Unitarian Church in Halifax. I had a wonderful time at the event. It is what happened after that is going to be the topic of this post.

I could outline the benefits here of working with a coven versus practicing as a solitary. But there are loads of posts already about that. I am talking about taking precautions with the coven you have joined, if you have. Not all covens are formally structured. Some covens are well structured. There is nothing wrong with how covens are structured, as each one is different and that is fine. Each has its own needs or strengths and weaknesses. But sometimes a more formal structure would be beneficial. There may be some power players or people within the coven who can make life miserable for you. I urge you to be cautious in who you meet in the covens. Sometimes life is a learning experience and a hurtful negative experience, as I recently experienced, is the outcome. This is not your fault but just because you are a Witch or Pagan or heathen does not necessarily need to mean jumping into the hungry lion’s lair or doing something you would later regret. Someone I met really hurt me and caused me pain and it was all totally unnecessary and could have been avoided had this person not felt the need to backstab me, and believe untrue negative things about me. I was really badly treated and I did not deserve it at all. So take the time to get to know coven members. You may have to see these people again and maintaining positive energy and being able to look your coven members in the eye the next day is a great bonus. The High Priestess or Priest may listen to your concerns but we are all adults, I am assuming, and not getting any younger. It would be nice if everyone acknowledged that fact but sometimes that is not the case. It is unfortunate. Breaking someone’s heart, no matter who it is, is not cool. That can work both ways.

I once performed an intuitive reading for someone where I learned a lesson. It was a good lesson and proves we never stop learning on this plane of existence. The lesson was that we need to find the person, and that is not limited to one type or whatever, that can care about us and love us in the way that we understand that we need to be cared for and loved. I repeat- we need to find the person who or could try to find the person that can love us back in the way we understand that we need to be cared for. That implies a more spiritual and committed type of caring. But isn’t that what you would want for yourself and someone else? I don’t know about any of you, but at my age and after all my hardship with men and negative experiences, I seriously doubt I will find the person who can care for me- and me care for that person- in the way I understand. Love, real love, is great. Some people are meant to find it and some are not, and I am beginning lately to feel that I am not. I know the way I need to be understood and I feel about as understandable as a seal/griffin/ platypus creature all in one. You get the picture. I know what is best for me and other people may just know what is best for them. That is the way the Universe works.

We are all responsible for our energy. We all have to take personal responsibility. So this is where being a solitary can be beneficial if you do not get on well with other coven members for whatever reason. Shit happens, as they say, but the resolution you reach for determines the outcome. When you practice by yourself, you are in total control and can do what you want when you want to and how you want to. Personally, I prefer the freedom. Yeah me, the #1 freedom lover. It seems I do a lot of things by myself but I have the courage to and I take pride in that. It must have to do with my personality.

Finding what works for you is good. Consider joining a study group before leaping into a coven. Study the path of witchcraft so you know if it feels right for you. If you join a coven, you are committed and should think hard before leaping into the flames, so to speak. Covens do not advertise in the Yellow Pages so it can be hard to find one, even harder to find what feels right for you. Never believe you have to enter any questionable sexual relationship to study to be a Witch. That is an outright lie. I never did and I studied my path just fine. That is a power trip. You should never have to compromise something sacred to you to do anything. Ever. I cannot emphasize that enough.

Clearly it is important to think carefully about things before you do them. Seems simple enough, right? But when you are in the heat of the moment, it is not so simple. That is where problems manifest into snarly troubled waters. And the lifeboat is way out of reach. So be careful in everything you do. I wish I was. A stitch in time saves nine!

Blessed Be,
Lady Spiderwitch )O(

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Filed under caution, Covens, power, responsibility, Safety, solitary, studying, witch

Thou shalt suffer a Witch to live

Merry Meet All,

This post shall focus on a slightly different note. As you may know, from past posts, I am writing my second novel. It is a ghost story and the main character is a Witch. I am in a lot of emotional turmoil lately. It is not the ghost that people are concerned about it is the fact that my character is a Witch.

Well this may be emotional, so if some of you have a problem with that, you can stop reading here. For you braver souls, read on. Well excuse me. Yeah so my mc is a Witch. I can’t believe the way I have been treated. It shows that there is still plenty of change to be made. I can’t believe people. They have either liked it that she was a Witch or stopped talking to me altogether or told me that I was wrong to cast a main character as a Witch. I feel as though I should apologize. Well. I refuse. I feel true empathy for my main character and I will soldier on.

I know now how Rowling felt or any other author brave enough to stray from the much-beaten path. Even my family members gave me heat about it. Some of them have stopped talking to me. Wow. We have come a long way and thought the worse was behind us only to discover the worst is ahead of us. Well march on, dear soldiers. I am proud of who I am. If some want to flag their ignorance, and berate me for my choice of how I tell my story, let them. Even if they stay silent in not responding to my well sent emails, then it still hurts. People have a right to how they feel. But shouldn’t I have rights? Right to peace of mind and freedom to tell my story how I want to without being afraid of being ostracized? I am still editing it and actually I confess to feeling like crap. I am on the precipice of a cliff and don’t know if I should turn back or leap. Is it worth the pain, the hate, the experience of being ostracized? Why the hate? What have we done to deserve it?

I refuse to apologize for who I am and for my beliefs and my novel. How else do we remain as individuals? Must we wear the same clothing, believe the same things, become a culture of conformity. We are all diverse and different and multiculture for a reason. I do not know why though I wish we could all learn to learn from each other and live with each other. But hopefully, in future generations, we shall.

We Witches have a right to be proud. My older brother said I couldn’t cast a main character as a Witch because readers won’t be able to relate to her. Well let’s see that leaves out Harry Potter, Hermoine Granger, and Minerva McGonnagall. They were Witches, weren’t they? What about Kelley Armstrong? I eventually concluded that he lived under a rock and has not troubled to try to see the light. I won’t take him seriously. Well I refuse to trouble myself to change my story to please the moronic muggles. That is what leads to moronic muggle-minded mindless fiction. Some of the best authors are the ones who were brave enough to hold true to their beliefs and their story. Witches walk between the worlds, an act that requires the utmost bravery. I can’t please everyone.

As a final note to my rant, has anyone besides me noticed that Witches are treated as evil in movies lately? I noticed it in Red Riding Hood, Brave, Lord of the Rings, and some others. I am deliberately boycotting the upcoming Hansel and Gretel movie. They act as Witch-Hunters. I will not be going to that movie.

I am not Korean or Hispanic. But you don’t see me telling someone to be Canadian or they will go to Hell. I tolerate much yet I am tolerated little in turn. Change is ugly and gory. But I hope one day there will be more understanding. I will stand with my shoulders out and my head held high. I attended the Writers Federation of Nova Scotia with no witch hat- but I did wear my cloak, a glittery blue dress I made myself, a circlet, top, and boots. I felt medieval and I looked medieval and it was great. Dare to be different. Dare to stand out. People will stare, so why not make it worth their while?

Lady Spiderwitch )0(
Merry Yule!!!


Filed under live, suffer a witch to live, witch


As the wheel turns to the next harvest Sabbat, when witches come out in droves for a gathering, there are some who practice solitary. They may still gather for the celebrations and I am not dissing that. I am one of those who practice my Craft solitary. I am going to talk a bit about that.

There are benefits and losses to being a Solitary Witch. One of the main benefits for me is that as I practice alone, i call all the shots. I am in control and I make the decisions. I have no problem with how things are run in a coven and have enjoyed it thoroughly when there was a High Priestess. For me, with the way I like to organize my rits and spells, I like the intimacy and the levels of power and energy that emanate from my altar.

The other big reason for me to practice as a Solitary Witch is that I also avoid politics or disagreements. While I do believe that no one wakes up intending to have differences, they still do happen. It is unfortunate and can be for any number of reasons, that seem quite petty in the long run. But differences do happen for whatever reason.

I did enjoy being in a coven. There are great things about being in a coven. A witch knows when there are events going on, where and with who. The coven can raise more energy in a collective than alone. There is a sense of community in a coven as well. The coven can also help you on your path and tell you where you have progressed spiritually and answer all your questions. These are great reasons to belong to a coven.

However, if your style or preferences or preferred tradition differs greatly from the coven, it is acceptable and most often does occur that a practitioner can become a Solitary Witch. I believe that a witch could keep some contact with a local pagan community when main events are held or major Sabbats are celebrated. A sense of community can help a witch enormously and one should not ignore the possibilities of good friendships that can be developed. Opportunities can arise, such a beach clean up, a fun fundraising event, a party, a Beltaine celebration (A chance to dig out your Renaissance garb), or a chance to call a quarter at a coven esbat Ritual. These should not be overlooked and can lead to even better opportunities. I do keep in touch with the local pagan community here and do not regret the numerous parties, fundraisers, the pagan radio show, or the celebrations at the Universalist Unitarian Church.

So, I still do practice as a Solitary Witch. It is my choice. I brew my ciders and carve pumpkins at Samhain. I honor the other turns in the Wheel of the Year. We all find our own way and develop what works for us. May the Goddess and God guide you as you light your own candles of understanding. Blessed Be Lady Spiderwitch


Filed under solitary, witch